Benjamin Teo
Losing your mum is one of those heartbreaks that rattles everything—your sense of home, safety, and even identity. There’s just no tidy way to wrap your head around it. When someone you care about is going through that kind of loss, it can feel impossible to know what to say or do; however, a simple remembrance gift can make a difference. While most people do their best to carry on, grief takes a real toll—27% of bereaved Australians report a decline in mental health, and 26% experience a decline in physical health after a significant loss. Sympathy gifts won’t fix the grief (and they’re not meant to), but they can offer comfort, connection, and a quiet reminder that they’re not alone in this.
What to Say (and What Not to Say) In Loving Memory
When someone’s recently lost their mother, it’s not about finding the perfect words—it’s about being present, gentle, and real. You don’t need to deliver a grand speech. Sometimes, a simple “I’m here for you” can mean the world. Or, if you knew their mum personally, something like “Your mother was a remarkable woman” adds a heartfelt touch of remembrance.
But there are a few phrases best left unsaid (even if they come from a good place). “She’s in a better place” or “Everything happens for a reason” might sound comforting, but they can feel dismissive to someone deep in grief. And saying “I know exactly how you feel”? That’s a tricky one, because really, every loss, such as the loss of a mother, is different.
If you’re unsure, here are a few better things to say:
- “I can’t imagine how hard this is for you.”
- “Your mother meant a lot to me, too.”
- “I’m holding space for you right now.”
Acts of Kindness Beyond Words
When someone’s grieving the loss of a mother, words often fall short—but actions? Those can speak volumes. Offering real, practical help is one of the kindest things you can do. Think about the everyday tasks that suddenly feel like climbing Everest when you’re in a fog of grief. If you can, step in with things like:
- Dropping off a few home-cooked meals (comfort food, always welcome).
- Doing the food shop or picking up dry cleaning.
- Offering to babysit, walk the dog, or tidy the house can be a thoughtful sympathy gift for loss during a difficult time.
What Is an Appropriate Sympathy Gift for Someone Who Lost Their Mum?
When someone has experienced the loss of a mother, the right gift isn’t about “fixing” the grief (let’s be honest—you can’t). It’s about showing love, presence, and gentle comfort during a harrowing time. The most meaningful sympathy gifts for the loss are those that feel sincere.
The Purpose of Bereavement Gifts
- Show respect, compassion, and ongoing care
- Acknowledge the loss of a loved one, without overwhelming them
- Let them know they’re not alone in their grief, even after the funeral
- Offer a condolence gift that brings warmth and remembrance
Types of Gifts For Loss
💌 Personal – Honours Her Memory
- A memorial necklace engraved with her initials, name, or fingerprint
- A keepsake box filled with cherished photos, old letters, or meaningful items
- A remembrance bracelet or angel wing charm—beautiful and subtle
- A personalised photo frame with a favourite image or comforting quote
- A custom music box playing a song that meant something to them
🧺 Practical – Offers Comfort in Daily Life
- A gift basket with herbal tea, snacks, and self-care items
- A sympathy gift box filled with bath salts, heat packs, or a sleep mask
- Books or journals focused on loss for emotional support
- Meal delivery gift cards or meal train coordination
- A “thinking of you” gift, like comfy pyjamas or calming candles
🌿 Symbolic – Represents Peace or Remembrance
- A flower planting or tree dedication ceremony in her memory
- A memorial plaque or custom garden stone for reflection
- A memorial lantern or an indoor-outdoor memory piece
- A decorative memorial heart or personalised wind chime
Timing Tips
- Early on: Keep it simple—think a candle, flowers, or a small keepsake
- Later: More reflective gifts like memorial jewellery or custom photo gifts may feel more appropriate
Best Rule of Thumb
- The tone of your relationship should guide the gift for a woman or a man.
- Keep it sincere and gentle—don’t overthink, speak from the heart
Gift Recommendation – Books and Resources
Sometimes, words help—especially the ones written by people who’ve been through it. If your grieving friend or family member finds solace in reading, consider giving them:
A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis
Raw, honest, and heartbreakingly relatable.
Grief Day by Day by Jan Warner
Perfect for those navigating the long road ahead.
Books on grieving a mother
Check out options from authors like Hope Edelman.
Children’s grief books
For little ones struggling to understand the loss of a loved one.
A grief journal or guided workbook
Gentle prompts for when they’re ready to open up.
Supporting Through Milestones
Grief doesn’t follow a neat little timeline, and for someone facing the loss of a mother, the ache doesn’t vanish once the funeral ends. Things often feel unbearably quiet when everyone else returns to everyday life. That’s why consistent, thoughtful support—especially around meaningful dates—is one of the most powerful ways to comfort someone grieving.
Remember Significant Dates
Anniversaries, birthdays, and Mother’s Day can reopen wounds, even years after the loss of a mother. A simple message like, “Thinking of you and your mum today,” can bring real comfort to someone who has lost a parent. If you want to go a step further, a small memorial gift for loss, like a sympathy wind chime, bracelet sympathy gift, or personalised keepsake, can be a beautiful way to say, “I remember her too.” These gestures, though simple, remind them they’re not alone in honouring the memory of their loved one.
Ongoing Check-Ins
Support often fades after the funeral, but grief doesn’t. That’s why ongoing check-ins are so valuable. A quick text, a coffee invite, or a spontaneous, “How are you doing?” can offer lasting comfort to someone dealing with losing a loved one. This is especially important if they’re also facing the loss of a dad or coping with pet sympathy. Even a quiet condolence memorial or thoughtful gift for grieving women can help them feel seen. The most meaningful gift ideas for the loss often arrive unexpectedly, when they need them most.
What to Send Instead of Flowers
Sure, flowers are lovely—but they wilt fast. Many alternatives offer real emotional value if you want something longer-lasting or more personal. Here are some meaningful sympathy gift ideas that go beyond the usual bouquet:
A personalised candle or memorial photo frame
Sharing a personal memory of their mum
A mother’s remembrance bracelet or keepsake piece
A sympathy basket filled with self-care goodies
To a cause she cared deeply about
Honouring the bond between mother and child
Gift Recommendation – Therapeutic and Creative Gifts
Creativity can be quietly healing. A calming or hands-on activity can offer a gentle sense of purpose and peace for someone feeling lost in grief. If you’re looking for a perfect gift that’s subtle but supportive, try one of these:
With a tranquil nature or a floral scene
With uplifting quotes or soft botanical patterns
Or a succulent garden they can care for
Paint-by-number or mindful creative sets
With knitting, embroidery, or clay modelling tools
Or a guided workbook for quiet reflection
Encouraging Professional Help
Grief—especially after the loss of a mother—can be overwhelming. While sympathy gifts for the loss offer comfort, professional emotional support is sometimes needed.
How to support someone who has lost a parent
Gently suggest professional help, like:
- A local grief counsellor
- Online therapy platforms
- Bereavement or support groups
Say something reassuring but straightforward like: “You don’t have to do this alone—there are people who understand.”
Offer to help:
- Research options
- Book appointments
- Attend the first session with them (if they want)
Why does it help?
- Particularly valuable after the loss of both parents or following the loss of dad after their mum
- Support groups remind them they’re not alone in their pain
- Hearing from others grieving the loss of a loved one can offer comfort and connection
Gift Recommendation – Acts of Service
Sometimes, the best sympathy gift isn’t a physical item at all—it’s showing up in tangible, practical ways when they’re too drained to ask. Grief doesn’t care about to-do lists, so being the person who steps in to lighten the load? That’s a gift sympathy rarely comes with, but one they’ll never forget.
Here are a few thoughtful ways to offer support through action:
Organise a schedule for home-cooked meals or send takeaway gift cards—one less thing to worry about.
Help with walks, feeding, or vet visits—especially in the early days after the funeral.
Laundry, groceries, or taking out the bins—simple gestures that offer real relief during grief.
Help with cards or memorial details to lift the emotional burden.
Drop off pyjamas, bath soaks, or sleep aids—a gentle nudge toward rest and recovery.
Emotional Support & Non-Gift Ways to Show You Care
When someone’s grieving the loss of a mother, even the smallest gesture can bring absolute comfort. You don’t always need a wrapped box or bouquet. Sometimes, showing up and offering emotional presence is the most meaningful grief gift.
- Acknowledge the loss openly. A sincere “I’m sorry for your loss” or “Thinking of you and your mum today” can offer powerful comfort. Avoiding the topic can leave someone who has lost a parent feeling isolated. These simple words honour the memory of their loved one.
- Offer practical help. Grief can make basic tasks—like school runs, groceries, or cleaning—impossible. Stepping in with small, thoughtful acts of service (like running errands or cooking a meal) is a unique way to bring absolute comfort to someone. This kind of care is especially meaningful when someone is facing the loss of a dad or dealing with pet sympathy on top of everything else.
- Be there long-term. Support doesn’t stop after the funeral. Keep checking in—especially around Mother’s Day, birthdays, and anniversaries. A simple message or a small memorial gift for loss, like a condolence memorial from Pavilion Gift Company, reminds them they’re still supported and that the loss of a mother gift doesn’t have to arrive all at once. Ongoing kindness, no matter how small, can make a lasting difference.
What Is a Good Care Package for a Grieving Family Who’s Lost Their Mum?
A thoughtful sympathy gift must not be fancy—it must be comforting. A well-put-together care package can bring practical relief and emotional warmth, especially when tailored to the family’s size and needs. Include a mix of:
- Herbal teas or hot chocolate
- Healthy (and not-so-healthy) snacks
- Tissues and cosy socks
- Scented bath products or heat packs
- A grief journal
- A handwritten note or poem
- Something comforting for younger children, if needed
A care package like this offers self-care when they may not have the energy to care for themselves. It’s the emotional equivalent of a warm hug—sometimes, that’s all they need.
Gift Recommendation – Personalised Gifts
If you’d like to offer something tangible besides your support, personalised memorial gifts for the loss are an incredibly touching option. They’re not just objects—they’re memory keepers.
A bracelet or necklace with initials or meaningful coordinates
Engraved with their mum’s signature or a personal message she once wrote
A lovely addition to a peaceful outdoor space
Plays a song that holds meaning in their relationship
Symbolising guidance from someone they’ve lost
For letters, jewellery, or treasured mementoes
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The original DadShop writer, owner, fun loving and tech guy. Great with computers, gadgets, quick on his feet and lover of novelty gifts. Ben writes for our wonderful blog occasionally just to pass time.
